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- I’ve chosen your place for two main reasons. First one is the study program. I went through the curriculum for all four years, checked every subject, and I find your curriculum superior to other competing universities in the country.
- I wanted to study with the best. You top the national rankings of universities, many top-class professors teach at your place, and I know that a degree from your university means something in the job interviews, and will open me doors to interesting places once I earn it.
- Honestly speaking, I applied with you because I know I have a realistic chance to get in. I haven’t been the best student at high school, and it would be a waste of time sending my application to certain universities, which would not even bother reading it once they see my GPA.
- I have several reasons for my choice. First of all, I did not get in the last year, but I had a really good impression from the interviews, and enjoyed my time with the teachers and students of the school.
- A world-famous university with global influence.
- Regular personalised teaching and academic discussion through our renowned tutorial system.
- Generous scholarships, bursaries and college support funds.
- Over 100 libraries and 5 world- class museums and collections.
- The feeling you get. “Concordia was the only school that I applied to that actually made me feel welcome,” says English and creative writing student Abigail Candelora from Georgetown, Ontario.
- Strong programs. “JMSB is considered one of the best business schools in the world.” Enough said for finance major Alexandre Karlov, referring to the John Molson School of Business.
- To experience life in North America’s best student city. An ongoing global pandemic has complicated plans to move to Montreal for university, but the draw of life in a place known for its cultural scene, low cost of living and inclusivity is a big factor for students dreaming about the future.
- To give back. “I’ve always liked helping people and giving back to the community,” says Meagan Wheeler, who’s pursuing a specialization in recreation and leisure studies.
- What’s Covered
- Essay Example #1: Upenn Nursing
- Essay Example #2: Upenn
- Essay Example #3: UW Madison
- Essay Example #4: Northwestern
- Essay Example #5: NYU
- Essay Example #6: NYU
- Essay Example #7: Boston University
- Essay Example #8: Boston University
- Essay Example #9: Tufts
What the Essay Did Well
This essay has many positive aspects, but the most impressive one is the structure. Utilizing the Five C’s of Caring to discuss Penn’s offerings was a genius way of tying in this student’s passion for nursing while also making their essay exciting and easy to read. Beginning each paragraph with the respective adjective helped focus the paragraph and allowed the student to demonstrate how they exemplify each quality without explicitly stating it. The student wasn’t afraid to think outside the...
What Could Be Improved
One thing this essay could do to make it stronger is improve the first paragraph. The student does a good job of setting up Sister Roach and the Five C’s, but they don’t mention anything about their desire to study or pursue nursing. The first paragraph mentions both Sister Roach and Penn, but left out the student. This could be fixed by simply adding something along the lines of “I can’t wait to embody these values as a nursing student at Penn” to the paragraph.
What the Essay Did Well
The real strength in the essay lies in the sheer number of details this student is able to include in a short space, without sacrificing style and flow. The first two paragraphs really have nothing to do with Penn, but the inclusion of them makes this response feel like an essay, rather than a list of offerings at Penn. Striking the balance is important, and the anecdote at the beginning ultimately humanizes the writer. From the three unique courses to the specific professor and his research...
What Could Be Improved
One area of improvement for this essay is the structure. It follows a very traditional “Why This College?” framework—start with an anecdote, then discuss classes, and then extracurriculars and programs—that gets old quickly for admissions officers. A great way to add some spice to the format would be to use a sample schedule for the day. This essay mentions three different classes, two different groups, and a Take Your Professor to Dinner opportunity. Together, that’s the recipe for a full da...
What the Essay Did Well
This essay is a stellar example. The day in the life formatting is a common way to spice up your “Why This College?” essay, but the way this writer executes it is nearly flawless. Opening with the vision board makes the student’s college goals clear from the very start, and this was cleverly done since vision boards are naturally one of the first things you see when you wake up. The student then takes us to specific courses and labs and shares their thoughts on how they could improve their in...
What Could Be Improved
There’s not much this essay could improve, besides a few formatting and wording issues. The first line of this essay—“Essay – # Day 117”—is a great attention-grabber, but the placement of the # symbol is confusing and perhaps should’ve been in front of the number. There are also a couple spots where wording is a bit awkward, such as these lines: I crossways with my roommate from the Chadbourne Residential College, who is also interested in researching applications of Computer Vision in real l...
What the Essay Did Well
This essay is extremely cohesive, as it focuses on the student’s agricultural background and desire to study environmental engineering. The student mentions a couple resources specific to Northwestern, such as the PLANT-Dx project and Engineers for a Sustainable World. Because of the background information the student provided, their motivations for participating in these opportunities is also clear. We can see that Northwestern would be a school that would help them achieve their goals.
What Could Be Improved
There are two main aspects of the essay that could be improved: the writing and its specificity. To begin with, the intro paragraph is a bit clunky and vague. The student should have specified the challenges the environment has presented to their parents’ farming with detailed imagery about droughts or torrential rain. The final sentence about climate change is also much too broad, and the student should’ve stated a goal in a smaller niche of environmentalism. For example, here’s what a rewri...
What the Essay Did Well
A core strength of this essay is the fact it takes its time to provide the reader with ample background on why this student is interested in nutrition and food studies and how they have grappled with difficult questions and surrounding this topic in the past. It’s okay to not mention anything about NYU for a whole paragraph if you are using that space to bring depth to your interests and tell the reader the crucial backstory behind pursuing your intended degree. Another positive aspect is the...
What Could Be Improved
This essay could be made stronger if there was a bit more personal reflection included. The first paragraph provides a lot of details on the student’s vegetarianism and how it conflicts with her grandmother and her heritage. What it doesn’t include very much of is how the student thinks and feels about her diet being at odds with that of her family. Does this student feel they are betraying their heritage by being vegetarian? What emotions do they feel when people criticize vegetarianism? Why...
What the Essay Did Well
This essay has an amazing introduction paragraph. It doesn’t mention anything about NYU or what this student is planning on studying, which is what makes it so intriguing. The reader doesn’t know where this student is headed after making such a seemingly unrelated statement about jewelry, but we want to find out. Not only does this essay immediately capture the reader’s attention, it maintains a succinct and direct tone that helps the reader effortlessly flow from one paragraph to the next. T...
What Could Be Improved
While this student does a good job of elaborating, they also mention a few key aspects of their personality as throw-away lines, when it would have been great to elaborate further on them. For example, they mention running a virtual sustainable fashion auction (cool!), but don’t provide us with any details on what that actually entails, how they got involved with it, what they enjoyed about it, etc. They also mention moving around a lot in the context of developing a diverse perspective, but...
What the Essay Did Well
This student clearly outlines BU-specific resources (the interdisciplinary course and undergrad research program), plus how these resources align with their professional goals (to become a neurological researcher). They do name professors, but since their work clearly relates to the student’s interests, it doesn’t look disingenuous, and shows that the student has done research on their fit with BU. The student also provides background on why they want to pursue research, and shows that they a...
What Could Be Improved
The only thing missing from this essay is the student’s fit with BU in terms of extracurriculars and social life. “Why This College?” essays should also cover extracurriculars, as colleges are also interested in how you’ll contribute to their community. In general, these essays should be academic-leaning (especially if they’re under 250 words), but you should still address some social aspects of the college that appeal to you (we recommend about 70% academics, 30% social, with more or less fo...
What the Essay Did Well
This student knows exactly what they want, and they’re not afraid to state it bluntly. Their intro paragraph is totally honest about their interests (or lack of interest), and we immediately understand one of their main college goals: to conduct political science research. The student mentions a specific resource, the Undergraduate Research Opportunities Program, as well as an alignment with BU’s value of encouraging independent study in all fields. Showing alignment with a specific value of...
What Could Be Improved
The writer mentions some of their research interests, but doesn’t explain the motivation behind them. We don’t actually learn very much about the student themself, which is a common flaw of “Why This College?” essays. The essay would’ve been stronger if they’d explained why they’re interested in “gender disparity in politics, or the relationship between dominant parties in power and the country’s economy and involvement in foreign affairs.” For example, maybe they feel strongly about abortion...
What the Essay Did Well
It’s hard to write a “Why This College?” essay in 100 words. This essay does a good job sticking to one unique element of Tufts—its intersectionality. Since Tufts also cares about demonstrated interest, it’s great that the student also mentioned speaking with an admissions counselor.
What Could Be Improved
We unfortunately don’t learn very much about the student from this essay. Why do they care about diversity and interfaith programs? How does this relate to their academic and career goals? While the word count is super short, they could’ve cut these lines and jumped right into the specific resource they’re interested in: Tufts’ inclusive definition of diversity goes beyond merely recruiting students from a variety of backgrounds. Tufts seeks to integrate these categories of diversity and push...
Graduate study at Oxford. There are over 13,000 graduate students at Oxford, forming half of the University’s overall student body. Graduate students are key to our academic community, and join our world-leading academics in tackling the most important questions we face today. Admission to graduate study at Oxford is very competitive.
Jan 14, 2024 · Why do you want to study in a university: Critical Skills and Personal Development. Life at University: Diversity, Culture, and Exploration. Cultural Immersion and Global Awareness. Opportunities to Explore Interests and Discover Passions. Preparation for the Future: Adapting to Industry Trends. Keeping Pace with Technological and Societal Changes.
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In this article, we look at what it is that makes Oxford University not only one of the best places to study in the world, but what makes those studies so valuable for success in later life. 1. You’re surrounded by some of the smartest people in the world
