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Jun 30, 2021 · People with a narcissistic style or diagnosable narcissistic personality disorder stubbornly cling to their psychological defenses and rarely cease promoting their own image. Over time, you may ...
- Are Narcissists Bad People? - Psychology Today
Note: I am using the terms “narcissist” or “narcissistic” as...
- Narcissist or Just Self-Centered? 4 Ways to Tell
At this point in the analysis—the quality of focus on...
- An Easy Way to Understand Narcissistic Behavior
An easy way to understand narcissistic behavior is to...
- Are Narcissists Bad People? - Psychology Today
- Narcissistic Vulnerability
- Narcissistic Shame
- Arrogance
- Grandiosity
- Entitlement
- Lack of Empathy
- Emptiness
- Lack of Boundaries
- Narcissistic Defenses
- Arrogance and Contempt
Despite having seemingly strong personalities, narcissists are actually very vulnerable. Psychotherapists consider them to be “fragile.” They suffer from profound alienation, emptiness, powerlessness, and lack of meaning. Due to their extreme vulnerability, they crave power and vigilantly must control their environment, people around them, and thei...
Underneath their façade is toxic shame, which may be unconscious. Shame makes narcissists feel insecure and inadequate―vulnerable feelings that they must deny to themselves and others. This is one reason that they can’t take criticism, responsibility, dissent, or negative feedback even when meant to be constructive. Instead, they demand uncondition...
To compensate for feeling inferior, they maintain an attitude of superiority. They’re often arrogant, critical, and disdainful of other people, including entire groups they consider inferior, such as immigrants, a racial minority, a lower economic class, or people of less education. Like bullies, they put down others to raise themselves up.
Their hidden shame accounts for their braggadocio and self-aggrandizement. They’re trying to convince themselves and others that they excel, that they’re uniquely special and the best, smartest, richest, most attractive, and most talented. This is also why narcissists gravitate toward celebrities and high status people, schools, organizations, and ...
Narcissists feel entitled to get what they want from others regardless of their behavior. Their sense of entitlement masks their inner shame and insecurity. They convince themselves that they’re superior and it follows that they deserve special treatment. For example, their time is more valuable than others, and they shouldn’t have to wait in line ...
Narcissists’ ability to respond emotionally and express appropriate care and concern is significantly impaired. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, narcissists lack empathy. They’re “unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.” (APA, 2013) Research shows that they have structural abn...
Narcissists lack a positive, emotional connection to themselves, making it difficult for them to emotionally connect with others. Their undeveloped self and deficient inner resources require them to be dependent on others for validation. Rather than confidence, they actually fear that they’re undesirable. They can only admire themselves as reflecte...
Mythological Narcissus fell in love with his own image, as reflected in a pool of water. At first, he didn’t realize that it was himself. This metaphorically describes narcissists. Narcissists’ inner emptiness, shame, and undeveloped self make them uncertain of their boundaries. They don’t experience other people as separate individuals, but as two...
It’s the defense mechanisms used by narcissists to protect their vulnerability that make relationships with narcissistsso difficult. Common defenses they use are arrogance and contempt, denial, projection, aggression, and envy.
These defenses inflate a narcissist’s ego with an air of superiority to shield against unconscious feelings of inadequacy. It also shifts shame by projecting inferiority onto others.
- Focus on self. By definition, self-centered people are, well, self-centered. People who were put on a pedestal as children, who were their parents' whole world, or who didn’t receive enough discipline and structure can easily become narcissistic.
- Empathy. Here is where the two groups start to diverge. Imagine that Jim’s date calls him out on his tendency to march ahead, or his wife says something about his hogging all the shrimp: If he is self-centered, he is likely to genuinely feel remorseful and might earnestly change his behavior and habits in the future.
- Grandiosity. Self-centered people crave attention from others, and can reliably find a way to talk about themselves when they begin to feel neglected and unimportant.
- Breaking rules. Self-centered people have clear moral values: I don’t cut in line, I don’t cheat on my partner. Again, empathy is present. Narcissists feel special; rules don’t apply to them.
Oct 9, 2024 · The word "narcissist" is often misunderstood and tossed around without thought. People might label someone a narcissist if they’re being self-centered, seeking attention, or showing off. But true narcissism is much more than just occasional selfish behavior or wanting recognition.
Sep 4, 2021 · An easy way to understand narcissistic behavior is to imagine the person is a car with a leaky gas tank. Other people are seen as either competitors or sources of fuel.
Jun 22, 2023 · A narcissist may behave in selfish ways, but someone with NPD is more than just selfish, according to Suraji Wagage, PhD, JD, a licensed clinical psychologist and co-founder and director of the Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Mindfulness.
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Feb 27, 2023 · Understand that selfish people behave in their own self-interest, regardless of how you behave. Their selfishness isn’t your fault. Try not to take their behavior personally or blame yourself.