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May 22, 2023 · Check out the best Dwight Schrute quotes from 'The Office.' These funny Dwight 'Office' quotes and lines will crack you up and remind you of your favorite show!
- “Before I do anything I ask myself, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ And if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing.”
- “Who is Justice Beaver?”
- “It’s a real shame because studies have shown that more information gets passed through water cooler gossip than through official memos. Which puts me at a disadvantage because I bring my own water to work.”
- “Jim told me you could buy gaydar online.”
Aug 22, 2022 · Unlike the rest of The Office characters, Dwight is much more multi-layered. In fact, although he’s probably the weirdest person you’ve ever met on screen due to the complexity of his character, Dwight’s also probably the most real of them all. And just read some of his wise quotes!
- Best Dwight Schrute Quotes
- Famous Dwight Schrute Quotes
- Inspirational Dwight Schrute Quotes
- Hilarious Dwight Schrute Quotes That Are So Like Him
- Dwight Schrute Quotes to Give You Insight on Love and Relationships
- Absurd Dwight Schrute Quotes That Are Full of Facts
- Funny Dwight Schrute Quotes
- Dwight Schrute Quotes to Make You Laugh
- Dwight Schrute Quotes That Tell The Story of His Family and Childhood
- Dwight Schrute Quotes For People Who Love Dark Jokes
1. “People learn in lots of different ways, but experience is the best teacher.” 2. “You only live once? False. You live every day. You only die once.” 3. “Failure of any kind is failure.” 4. “Will I get over it? Mmm. No. But life goes on.” 5. “All you need is love? False. The four basic human necessities are air, water, food, and shelter.” 6. “D.W...
11. “Who is Justice Beaver?” 12. “Would I ever leave this company? Look, I’m all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what I’m being paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued loyalty more highly, I’m going wherever they value loyalty the most.” 13. “It’s better to be hurt by someone you know accidentally than ...
21. “No, don’t call me a hero. Do you know who the real heroes are? The guys who wake up every morning and go into their normal jobs and get a distress call from the Commissioner and take off their glasses and change into capes and fly around fighting crime. Those are the real heroes.” 22. “The dictionary defines superlative as: of the highest kind...
24. “People underestimate the power of nostalgia. Nostalgia is truly one of the greatest human weaknesses, second only to the neck.” 25. “It’s a real shame because studies have shown that more information gets passed through water cooler gossip than through official memos, which puts me at a disadvantage because I bring my own water to work.” 26. “...
34. “Listen to me! I love you! And I don’t care that Phillip’s not my son! I will raise 100 children with 100 of your lovers if it means I can be with you!” 35. “Women are like wolves. If you want one, you must trap it, snare it, tame it, feed it.” 36. “A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present.” 37. “Reject a woman, and she will never l...
39. “Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year.” 40. “Do I have a date for Valentine’s Day? Yes, February 14th.” 41. “Today is your birthday? False. Today is the anniversary of your birthday.” 42. “Many ideas were not appreciated in their time. Like shampoo.” 43. “Sasquatches are the strongest animal on the planet, s...
48. “Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors.” 49. “I wish I could menstruate. If I could menstruate, I wouldn’t have to deal with idiotic calendars anymore. I’d just be able to count down from my previous cycle. Plus, I’d be more in tune with the moon and the tides.” 50. Pam Beesly: “Dwight, am I hot right now?”...
62. “Michael, you shouldn’t have to settle. This is my pledge to you. I will find her, and I will bring her to you. And as God as my witness, she shall bear your fruit.” 63. “I don’t have a lot of experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor’s dog.” 64. Osc...
76. “The Civil War history industry has conveniently forgotten about the battle of Schrute Farms. Whatever. I’m over it. It’s just grossly irresponsible.” 77. “There are 40 rules all Schrute boys must learn before the age of five. You better learn your rules. If you don’t, you’ll be eaten in your sleep.” 78. “Congratulations on your one cousin. I h...
85. “I always wondered how they picked the person to die. I’d be good at picking the person.” 86. “In the end, the greatest snowball isn’t a snowball at all. It’s fear. Merry Christmas.” 87. “Everyone, follow me to the shelter. We’ve got enough food for 14 days. After that, we have a difficult conversation.” 88. “As a volunteer Sheriff’s Deputy, I’...
Sep 6, 2024 · Dwight Schrute Quotes. Dwight Schrute is one of the most memorable and lovable TV characters to emerge from the past decade. A fan-favorite from The Office, his charming awkwardness and know-it-all personality were a constant source of feel-good entertainment in the hit show.
Sep 15, 2020 · The Office: 15 Of The Best Dwight Schrute Quotes. By Savannah Di Leo. Updated Sep 15, 2020. Dwight Schrute was definitely one of the reasons that The Office was so iconic. Every episode heralded a new shenanigan courtesy of the assistant (to the) regional manager, and he was arguably the most quotable character on the show.
Sep 17, 2020 · Some of the most hilarious moments from 'The Office' come from Dwight Schrute quotes. Here are just a few of his best one-liners.
