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- You’re terrible, Muriel. Translation: Face palm.
- Bill Heslop: You Can’t Stop ProgresS. Translation: Bill Heslop’s version of It’s Time. Except he didn’t win.
- I’m a bride. I’m supposed to be euphoric! Translation: I’m married! I’m beautiful! (This is actually another quote from the ever-lovely Tania)
- Wait! Let her finish her Orgasm. Let her finish her fruity cocktail before we destroy her happiness.
Great memorable quotes and script exchanges from the Muriel's Wedding movie on Quotes.net.
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At Muriel's elaborate wedding in Sydney, Tania, Cheryl, and Janine are her bridesmaids; bitter Rhonda refuses to be one. Bill openly treats Deidre as his date, and Betty is late to the wedding as she is unable to afford plane tickets; Muriel does not notice her at the wedding.
Bill brings his whole family to the banquet, then abuses them, particularly Muriel (Toni Collette), for being useless. Bill invites local beautician Deirdre Chambers (Gennie Nevinson) to join the table. Mrs Heslop (Jeanie Drynan) does not realise that Deirdre is having an affair with her husband.
Bill: Push over, Penelope. Tania: If I feel you've changed, I'll tell you. I'm honest. Unlike some people, I tell it like it is. Rhonda: Sorry, Mum. You know I love you, but you drive me crazy. And you three, what a bunch of cocksuckers. Tania: I'm a bride. Rhonda: Are you Muriel Heslop? Muriel: No. Rhonda: Yes, you are! Muriel: Why?
Voila! Finally, the Muriel's Wedding script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Toni Collette movie. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of Muriel's Wedding.
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Bill Heslop: [to Perry] Keep your eye on them journalist bastards. Funeral Priest : "To Bill Heslop and Family. Hazel and I were sorry to hear of the passing of Betty.