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- The Employment Turnover of the Credits. “We apologize again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.”
- Weight Ratios and the Humble Swallow. “Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?” – Soldier. One of Monty Python’s calling card joke constructions is presenting an absurdity and then allowing a few characters to nitpick it to death with over-informed logic.
- Bring Out Your Dead. “I’m not dead” – Carried Man. Often misremembered as “I’m not quite dead” or “I’m not dead yet,” the old man protesting his placement on the plague cart is a deliciously dark joke done with great sincerity.
- Debating Government with the Common Folk. “Well, I didn’t vote for you.” – Peasant Woman to King Arthur. Is England a monarchy? A dictatorship? An autonomous collective?
Sep 18, 2024 · Monty Python & the Holy Grail is a true comedy classic, and we're celebrating the best quotes and moments.
- Nick Venable
- "Are You Suggesting That Coconuts Migrate?" - Castle Guard
- "I Didn't Know You Were called Dennis!" - King Arthur
- "I Thought Your Son Was A Lady." - Sir Lancelot
- "You Make Me sad. So Be it. Come, Patsy." - King Arthur
- "You're Arm's Off!" - King Arthur "No, It isn't." - The Black Knight
- "She Turned Me Into A Newt!... I Got better." - Angry Villager
- "There Are Those Who Call Me...Tim." - Tim The Enchanter
- "What Do You mean, An African Or European Swallow?" - King Arthur
- "One Day All This Will Be Yours!" - Swamp King "What, The curtains?" - Herbert
- "Run Away! Run Away!" - King Arthur and His Knights
The castle guard won't let King Arthur in, nor even continue to fully explain why he's there. Instead, the guard insists upon dissecting the subject of King Arthur's coconut shells which he uses to make clip-clopping noises of horse hooves in place of having an actual horse. The guard exclaims that it makes no sense that coconuts should be found in...
King Arthur calls along to who he thinks is an old woman, to end up being lambasted by a man who asserts that he's very much not a woman and also not old, but thirty-seven. RELATED: Monty Python: 10 Best Songs From Monty Python's Flying Circus And The Movies The two argue about what King Arthur should have called him, to which the man responds that...
If anyone has read the medieval stories on which this movie is based, then it's no mystery as to what really drove Lancelot the whole time, but this hysterical skit and this equally funny quote put that into stark relief. No damsel in distress means that the fearless knight suddenly loses his motivation, but luckily his popularity covers any minor ...
King Arthur asks a particularly ferocious Knight whom he witnessed kill another man in the woods to join his quest. He repeatedly urges the Knight to respond to him, but the Knight remains silent. King Arthur eventually gives up, expressing his disappointment with a hilariously childish tone and choice of words. This scene is based on the original ...
The King fights a Knight who will not let him pass through the woods and quickly cuts the Knights arm off. The Knight refuses to acknowledge that he's just had his arm cut off, referring to it as "only a scratch", and challenges the King to keep fighting him as if nothing has happened. RELATED: John Cleese: 10 Best Movies And TV Shows, Ranked (Acco...
A crowd of townspeople is in a rage about burning a witch--or a woman they claim to be a witch. They pretty easily admit that they actually tied a fake nose to her face and dressed her up, but insist that she does have a wart and is, therefore, a witch. When this is also questioned, one of the townspeople proclaims that she turned him into a newt--...
Oh, were you expecting something more dramatic? Wrong movie, viewing pubic! The way John Cleese delivers this line is perfect as if he's having a hard time believing it himself. Plus, we're about to see a killer bunny, so Tim is the least of our worries. Is it merely a silly joke, or a clever way to predict how names would look in present-day MMORP...
The movie might have had a limited budget, but that doesn't mean that the acting and writing weren't stellar. This line from the opening scene comes full circle to help Arthur safely cross the Bridge of Death, thwarting the Bridgekeeper and his not-so-impossible questions. Sir Bedivere, who missed that opening scene, is impressed by Arthur's scient...
A young lord and his father sit staring out a window romantically, and the father asserts that everything the boy sees will one day be his. The moment is set up perfectly to be one of dignity and masculine bonding, but it's immediately broken by the boy's absurd and moronic assertion that his father is talking about the curtains around the window. ...
This may be one of the most recognizable lines from the movie, short and unremarkable yet reminiscent of the particular kind of humor unique to the work of Monty Python. The Knights yell it whenever they are giving up a fight, in an instance where, in a normal period-film, an army would shout "retreat!" This is, of course, a way to take something t...
- From Monty Python and the Holy Grail. “Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.” Bedevere: “What makes you think she is a witch?”
- From The Life of Brian. “He’s not the Messiah – he’s a very naughty boy.” “Look, I don’t think it ought to be blasphemy, just saying ‘Jehovah’.” “You’re only making it worse for yourself!”
- From The Meaning of Life. “Is it a boy or a girl?” “I think it’s a bit early to start imposing roles on it, don’t you?” “The mill’s closed. There’s no more work.
- From the Flying Circus TV show. “This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be! It’s expired and gone to meet its maker! This is a late parrot! It’s a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace!
The following quotes are some of the very best and funniest, ranked below in a way that will hopefully anger as few people as possible (that’s your warning in advance that there will be...
Searching for the funniest Monty Python and the Holy Grail quotes? Check out this collection that will engross you with the movie's humor and timeless puns!
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Sep 24, 2024 · The quotations on this crowd-ranked list were chosen based on their cultural impact, comedic brilliance, and significance to the movie's plot. They continue to entertain new generations, highlighting the enduring legacy of Monty Python's droll genius. Which lines are your favorites? Vote them up!
