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Mar 11, 2021 · If you or your ex are texting, calling, DMing, or spending time with each other frequently but say you don't see a future together, that can sometimes send mixed signals. Not only can this be confusing, but it can also make it difficult to truly move on from the relationship , Cullins says.
- Breadcrumbing
Making ambiguous plans with you that never seem to pan out....
- Friends With Benefits
Likewise, if you notice the person you're with is not...
- Breadcrumbing
- Overview
- Addressing the Issue With a Flirt
- Addressing the Issue in a Relationship
- Establishing Your Own Feelings
- Looking for Red Flags and Signs of Love
Whether you're in a relationship or not, you may find that the other person is giving you mixed signals. You can always handle the problem by starting a conversation about it, but you can also use more indirect ways to see if the person is actually interested in you. You may also want to spend some time evaluating what you're feeling and whether yo...
Decide if you're reading too much into the situation.
Sometimes, if you're just flirting with a person, you may read the situation as more flirtatious than it is.
Studies have shown that men, especially, are guilty of this problem. That is, men are more likely to read an innocent gesture as sexual or flirtatious than women.
It may be the person isn't giving you mixed signals at all. It may be that the person is simply being nice or friendly, and you are reading more into it than you should.
Watch the person's social interactions.
If you're not sure whether the person is flirting with you or not, pay attention to how that person interacts with other people. If they're treating everyone else the same way, then they're likely not flirting with you. However, if you seem to be getting special attention, they may be flirting with you.
One option is to just back off a bit to let the person figure out their feelings. If you back off, the person may realize one of two things. First, the person may miss you, making them decide that they really want to be with you. The second option is the person may not miss you, and they may find it easy to move on. Either way, you've got an answer.
If you're getting mixed signals from your partner or even someone you just may like but haven't approached, the best way to deal with it is to bring it up with them. The person may not even realize they're giving off mixed signals.
Consider how far along you are in the relationship. If you've only been on a couple of dates, having a serious commitment talk is going to scare the other person off. In that case, you can still bring it up, just keep it more lighthearted.
Similarly, if you're just trying to see if someone likes you, you're going to approach the conversation a bit differently, by feeling out whether the person is into you or not.
Learn the emotions behind giving mixed signals.
Some people, including yourself, don't give mixed signals on purpose. Rather, mixed signals are a sign of a deeper problem, usually a conflict between opposing values in relationships.
For instance, some people always want what's on the other side. When not in a relationship, they want the connection of being in a relationship. When in a relationship, they want the independence outside of a relationship. Once they get one, the other value seems much better, so they move towards that instead. Therefore, as they get too close to someone, they instantly start moving away.
Some other pairs include control and spontaneity, freedom and responsibility, and novelty and stability. Each time the person gets one, the other becomes automatically more appealing.
Realize that it may stem from other issues.
A person sending mixed signals may have nothing to do with you at all. In fact, it could be the person is insecure or has had problems in past relationships. In that case, they may have a tendency to hold you at arm's length, even when they want to be with you.
Watch for a control freak.
If you're dating someone, you want to know ahead of time if that person is going to want to control every single aspect of your relationship. One way you can check for this trait is to watch for someone who will not vary their schedule or routine at all. Try changing a date to another time to see if the person can roll with it.
This symptom can also be a sign that the person is not willing to compromise, another bad sign.
Either way, you probably want to get out of this relationship.
See if the person wants to spend time with you.
Someone who loves you, or at least likes you, will want to spend time with you without you feeling the need to beg. That person will make time for you because they enjoy your company and want to develop a relationship.
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Sep 8, 2024 · “Mixed signals” describes someone's inconsistent romantic behavior. In dating, “mixed signals” are when someone’s words and actions make it hard to tell what they want from a relationship. They’re hot and they’re cold. They make plans, then bail last minute.
Oct 14, 2019 · Sometimes, wires get crossed, triggering vulnerabilities and insecurities that can throw you for a loop, but this advice from relationship pros can help you move forward from these common mixed signals.
Jun 28, 2024 · How to tell someone you’re getting mixed signals. If you’re getting mixed signals but you think your partner could be doing it unintentionally, our experts agree: clear, consistent, and...
Nov 27, 2023 · There are two key elements that define mixed signals, which are: inconsistent displays of interest or affection and poor communication, says Washington, D.C.-based relationship therapist Emily...
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Ambivalence is a common emotional experience—far more common than our culture acknowledges or we like to admit. When someone gives you mixed signals, it’s probably a sign they’re ambivalent: about love, about closeness, about dating, about intimacy, about sex, about friendship, about trust.